I ate too much this morning - french toast, a hot dog, a muffin and an ice cream sandwich.
I went on a 5k bike ride and then purged.
then ate quesidillas and perogies, and purged.
...then a shitload, and purged.
So I'm at 0 cals...again. :/
And I'm drinking water like no other.
New Plan.
REST OF TODAY - WATER ONLY.
June 16, 2011 (tomorrow) - liquid fast
June 17, 2011(sunday) - liquid fast
June 18, 2011 (monday) - liquid fast
June 19, 2011 (tuesday) - fruit binge day
June 20, 2011 (wednesday) - water fast.
I feel like I should be more upset with myself then I am for eating. I feel like a fat turd, but at the same time, it was good and maybe I just needed the food...I don't know. I need to look into getting lax , and diet pills.
Any info on whether TUMS are supposed to curb hunger, please inbox me on PT.
It just all sucks...I don't know.
Today I will be cleaning my room like no other, getting everything organized and doing some brainstorming, and making my intentions clear with myself as to why I'm doing this. I may just be lacking motivation.
10:02 p.m. update:
Okay, screw the whole "maybe I needed the food". This was a day of weakness, of a loss of control, and I'm so weak for doing this. Tomorrow better the hell be better or I don't know what to do. I cut myself after the third purge, and I've only had water after that. And my mom didn't notice anything thank Goodness.
Thinspiration:
Leighton Meester
like, how gorgeous? >.< URG. I want to be her.
Farewell, tomorrow will be better.
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